Self Love; Is it necessary?

 We must be willing to get rid of the life we've planned, so as to have the life that is waiting for us;

                                                                                                           - Joseph Campbell

What is Self Love?

Falling in love is as easy as breathing, but staying in love? That costs you your entire life! Everything is as colorful as rainbow at first, as the time passes by somehow it turns pale and colorless; Is love like that or are you not loving the right way? Well let's get something straight here, shall we? There is no right or wrong way of loving but loving the "right" or "wrong" person. 

 When you love, you give yourself to someone and you expect that person to do right by you. 

Do we always get what we expect? Rejection, Hate, A solid Heart break, Pain, to an extent that you loose Yourself.

Have you ever questioned yourself, If you showered yourself with the unconditional love you shower on the "wrong" person? Would you ever need anyone's presence, attention,or care, let alone love!

We learn it the hard way, Self-Love. 

We learn it the hard way that You (yourself) are the only person in the entire world who's going to stay with you until you die and beyond. (Who knows).

You can be the only one to know you, to understand your needs. You get the whole gist right!

It comes down to one point, You are the master of your fate, captain of your soul.

They say/preach self-love is important, but do they say why?

Why Self-Love?

Self love has to do a lot with acceptance. We tend to accept anything and everything from the person we love the most, their flaws and faults are accepted and forgiven. Do we treat ourselves the same way? 

Accept ourselves with our faults and flaws? Accept our skin, our color, our body, our biggest insecurities and still love ourselves unconditionally?

Self-Love is accepting yourself just the way you are.

Look yourself at the mirror, instead of picking up your flaws, make a list of your features, your perfections, your beauty! Now, acceptance doesn't mean accepting for the name sake, it is something you feel, accepting yourself Inside Out.

Invest your time and energy into yourself, into your growth, into your goal, your success. You have to train your mind to be stronger than your emotions or else you will loose yourself every time. 

You just need to remember,

No one can hurt you or bring you down unless you allow them to.

When you face yourself in the mirror, eye to eye what do you see? Do you see a strong fierce woman? A strong personality who determines and achieves what she wants? What makes you different from others is the fact that you acknowledge every detail, every emotion, feel it and process it in your own way. You are sensitive, you are child-like, you know your grounds, you are a cry-baby, you are emotional as well; Yet you are strong, you are well aware of your emotional strength, you need a good cry to let your emotions out, you know how to handle yourself, how to deal with vulnerability and loneliness.You do not allow someone to consume you, you do not allow them to take control over your life or your being.

Self Love does not mean being Selfish. It is self-exploration, self-acceptance, realizing your worth, to know what you are capable of, to set standards and boundaries. Standards to yourself, to reach there. Boundaries to the whole world, because no one has that right to hurt you in any possible way!

The Journey to Self Love -

The journey is a bitter sweet one, to be honest mostly bitter, but once you start to dance on your own beat! You will enjoy being alone, you will enjoy your own company, your perspective broadens. You unleash a new You. Acceptance starts with Denial. Strange? But is actually true! A bad experience, which should probably be forgotten like a bad dream, we rewind it, watch it on repeat in the back of our heads. We deny the fact that it is just a bad dream, that we are perfectly capable to accept, and forget it.

Our mind and heart are two fragile parts, it takes time to process some situations, facts or what we call REALITY. Often a break-up, an ending brings a new beginning. A break-up is nearly traumatic, where the mind and heart has to process, the person you had is not going to be a part of you anymore. The person you looked up to, is not going to hold you no more. 

In the search of a new dependence, a new person, a new habit; You either look for someone else or you find yourself, the real and ONLY person you can trust, you can depend on.

Your mind is a blank canvas, you choose what colors to put in, you choose what to fill into your mind, what you teach yourself is what you preach. When you love yourself to the fullest you accept yourself fully and no amount of "outer sourced" confidence is needed, because you have it all in you.

Habits that encourage self love-

A consistent practice turns into a habit, habits are a person's routine and a routine portrays a person's life; It all starts with an interest and ends up being a part of you. Habits shapes the person, habits make you who you are, defines who you are and what you can be. Some of the *Must Have* habits everyone should have are-

• Compare Yourself to Yourself - Comparison is good, when you have the right aspects. You can compare you only with yourself, past is meant to be remembered to measure the amount of growth and change you went through. See the change, look back and witness the graph from not accepting yourself to completely adoring yourself!
• Allow yourself to make those mistakes - You learn to walk only after falling like a thousand times, you will learn everything else when you make those mistakes, to realize your wrongs, you will correct yourself, with no one else's involvement. You will be self-sufficient!
• Hold that Over-thinker inside - We all have been our worst critic, our worst enemy! But only if we could have a hold over that express train like brain of ours. Train your mind, control it. Remember, you loose when your thoughts control you, instead of you controlling them.
• Set a routine - Make a routine, get into a habit of indulging into self-care and self-pampering sessions. You deserve a but of time for yourself, to relax, to feel beautiful from the inside! 
• Celebrate everyday - Celebrate the fact that you get to see another day, Celebrate every day even if it is a bad one. Bad days brings out the best in us. Make a cheers to discover the best in you and pay your gratitude for a bad day. It brought out the stronger you.
• Stop paying attention - Stop yourself from spending every waking second into something that drains your energy and gets you out of your peace. Peace of mind body and soul is the utmost necessity. No one should be *allowed* to play with it.

Just remember to invest more into yourself than into something\someone which is temporary. Change is considered to be good, change is inevitable. Change is the only element which is permanent in the universe. So, why not make the fullest of it? 

We all are temporary in this wicked, twisted world. When you decided to love unconditionally, shower some on yourself as well. Why? Because, honey You deserve all the love in the world!.

You do not have to wait for someone to come shower it on you, or to tell you that you are beautiful. You are perfectly capable to tell yourself -

"I've got this. I am Beautiful and deserving. I live my life on my terms. Also, a few bad days does not define my life!" 

So, here's to every individual who has been through hell and back, who is going through one and who is about to enter one, You all deserve the appreciation for putting up with life, with yourself. 

For making it this far, and also to cross borders, You deserve to be Crowned. You are a warrior.

A toast! To Us!

Stay True! Stay Safe! Stay Positive! 

Until next time..